It’s not you. It’s me.
When I first saw you, I’ll admit I was a bit intrigued. My friends thought you were kind of cool. But now that I’ve seen you a bit and gotten to know you better, I have come to a conclusion.
We can never be together, because you are ugly.
I know I’m being superficial. But I can’t change who I am, just as you can’t change how incredibly ridiculous you look.
And I know there’s a lot more to you than just your looks. I know you would protect me from harm while allowing me freedom and flexibility. I appreciate that, but I just can’t get over what my friends would say. I would be ashamed to be seen in public with you.
Please don’t try to change my mind. Life will be harder without you, but I’m willing to accept a few blisters and scrapes if it means looking better. I’m sure you will find someone who can see beyond your hideous exterior and appreciate you for your practical qualities. I hear that many people have recently ended their relationships with Crocs; you may want to start there.
Superbuff: Vibram FiveFingers are ugly. Train barefoot and make your feet strong!
Do they make under garments